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How can we forgive someone who has hurt us?
By: Hamidullah Hamidi
Life partners who are not committed, parents who did not meet your expectations as expected in childhood and many others who have suffered in life, sometimes cause such a deep wound in your body. You try to say to yourself, “I will never forgive you.”, “Some people are worth nothing.” Religious leaders and psychologists, on the other hand, say that forgiveness saves us from the torment of conscience and relieves stress, which is vital for health and psychological well-being. When we hear these words, we say to ourselves, “Shall I forgive him or not?” How can we forgive this when there is no possibility of it?
“Four years ago, I was presenting an academic seminar on ‘Forgiveness between Husband and Wife,'” says one psychologist. One of them said to me, “What I presented at the seminar was very interesting, but I don’t think everyone deserves to be forgiven. How much will we forgive?”
There are probably a lot of people who think that. They think that those who once made a mistake or think badly of you should be forgiven, but if this practice continues then no one is worthy of forgiveness.
Two years later, I saw the same man, with a smile on his face, and he said, “I’ve changed my mind about forgiveness.” “Because I have tasted forgiveness and I don’t want to deal with anything else.”
Of course, there have been times when you have been hurt by someone or you have been hurt by them. Many people do not value such small talk and call it babeza, but there are some people who keep repeating such things or words in their mind, thus spreading negative signals in their mind and making them sad. Becomes two. They always think that the other person has done them a great disservice to the truth, so they get upset with him and think negatively about him, this action causes him to lose his peace of mind. To pay.
Here is an example of a housewife:
One night her husband comes home late from work, what do you think his wife will do with this incident?
2. Do you think that this is a small thing, maybe the work has been delayed and you have gone home late?
3. Or she may think that her children are still hungry and that her husband is too poor to care for them.
This kind of talk produces positive energy in the husband and he responds in a very good and sweet tone:
Today I had a lot of work to do and I couldn’t get home on time.
Clearly, the husband is late and has not informed the family of his late departure, so he may be forgiven for doing so
But why? Because there is something in our culture that says, the taste that is in forgiveness is not in revenge. You just have to be more discriminating with the help you render toward other people.